Happy Meme Monday: When You Have More Than One Child – Or Two

If there’s something to know about what happens when I walk out my door with my tribe, is that we can get a lot of attention and often times, not the good kind of attention – facial expressions, whispering, you name it, it’s happened! Do you get that or is just me? No, yes – just me?! Haha!

So, it’s happened where a complete stranger will stop me and ask me if the children are all mine, to which I’ll respond with something along these lines …. because, hey, no harm in playing along with what seems to be peoples worst nightmares come to reality in form of mwua.

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I never did have twins – only what seems to be a couple sets in the mix!

Hope you have a great Monday.

A-

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Happy Meme Monday: Bedtime Routine

It’s a new day, the start of a new week, new goals to achieve and a new perspective to take on. As a stay at home mom, one of the many misconceptions that comes along with that, is that I have all the free time in the world. Negative! Ha, I wish! Aside from the my Chiari + Syringomyelia diagnosis I also hold more valuable titles, I’m a full time mommy, I have this blog ‘part-time’ and I also opened not too long ago an online shop that I make time to do my own designs. So, time’s definitely not on my side and this bedtime routine has so much truth ….

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Yes, this definitely sums up our bedtime ‘routine’ around my household!

Have a blessed day!

A-

 

 

Release The Pressure

Release The Pressure

I don’t often watch television, but do have some programs set on the DVR. On some days when the time is just right, I’ll watch something live – today was one of those days. I’ve not only been a little on edge because of last weeks visit to the ENT  but also feel at times overwhelmed, I’m the one people come to for comfort or to be heard – not that it’s a bad thing. My therapist once told me, it’s a good thing to listen to someone speak about their own struggles because at times it can give you a sense of comfort knowing that you are not alone. Can I remind you of the quote, ‘misery loves company’? Yes, sometimes within my own ‘misery,’ I like to find someone else who’s living within the same miserable state. It makes me feel less alone, ultimately, less miserable. It’s helpful! But it can be hard to be present in someones else’s life when I have ongoing health issues – not to mention the biggest one of them all, Chiari. I do it of course! However, I lend an ear out of respect because I’ve been sought after, but would I rather be doing something else, absolutely!

“Do not become the 911 in everybody’s life, just stop and release yourself of the pressure.”

– Steve Harvey

As the little ones took their afternoon nap, today I was able to watch the Steve Harvey Show. He’s funny, he’s witty and one of the few adults with wisdom. Yes, I’m that person that believes age doesn’t always equal wisdom. So, today the topic of ‘releasing the pressure from yourself’ came up. That was music to my ears folks! Yes, yes! Do you have that friend or family member that only calls when they need you, when they need something from you, when they need you to do something for them? Do you feel responsible to help them, to be there for them, to do what they’ve just asked you to do? Yes, I’m there, I have those! So, he was saying to take the pressure off from the need to be there for them. It’s not in a condescending way – no! It’s for yourself, do this for you! ‘You are only responsible for your children. If the person is not your child, then you are not responsible for them and you are welcome to take the pressure off yourself!’ He brought a point we too often forget and a good point at that, ‘if they didn’t have you, what would they do?’ So, he also recommended you stop receiving their calls, because all their calls tend to be for ‘requests’ and if you can, to stop listening to your voicemails, because 95% of the time voicemails are ‘requests’. They will leave that voicemail saying, ‘call me, it’s important.’ I couldn’t help but laugh, because it true! It’s so true! If you’re not laughing, maybe it’s because you’re the other person. Eek! I often think, wait, I need to answer or I need to listen to the voicemail because, what if it’s an emergency?! Here’s what Mr. Harvey said, ‘all emergencies or problems pass within 24 hours’ and encourages that you ‘don’t become the 911 in everybody’s life, just stop and release yourself of the pressure.’ And I think, if it were an actual emergency, they’d be calling 911 – not you.

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One of my children’s movies comes to mind and it says it best, ‘sit down before you hurt yourself!’ We put so much pressure on ourselves to be in everyone else’s lives, we forget to be present in our own. And I am a firm believer on how stress and anxiety can may very well be the culprit of the way you feel, this pressure makes you sick – literally. I don’t know why I needed to hear that today, but I’m so glad I did, some reassurance is good and always welcomed!  It’s good to put me/you first and not feel remorseful for it.

Happy day!

A-

The Liebster Award

I can not be anymore excited about this … I was nominated for the Liebster Award by the amazing writer/blogger over at Reveuse!!!! Mahee please know I can not thank you enough for thinking about this little blog that could. I’m both humbled and thankful for this nomination. Your writing is both lovely as it is uplifting and I hope that you continue to inspire others the way you inspire me.

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About the Award

The Liebster is an award given to new and upcoming blogs, as nominated by fellow bloggers, in order to give exposure and foster a community of recognition and appreciation. The award was first implemented in 2011, and has been in place each year since.

The official rules for 2018 are as follows, and can be found in entirety on the blog The Global Aussie, at https://theglobalaussie.com/liebster-award-2018/

Rules — Overviews

⇒ Link to official rules blog post in your Liebster Award blog post
⇒ Answer the questions given to you (11)
⇒ Create more questions for your nominees to answer (11)
⇒ Comment on the official rules blog post with a link DIRECTLY to your Liebster Award nomination post.
⇒ Entries start 1st of Jan 2018 and ends on the 25th Dec 2018. The winner will be picked on the 31st of December.

Rules 

• Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.

• Answer the questions you were asked.

• Share 10 random facts about yourself.

• Nominate at least 3 blogs for the award.

• Ask your nominees 10 questions and inform them of the nomination.


Facts About Me

1. I love to bake – anything from birthday cakes to cupcakes to brownies to chocolate chip / sugar cookies to flan and I also love to try new recipes – however, I will not eat my own baking creations

2. I need like to be in control 

3. I’m impatient with people that talk in circles ultimately wanting to feed me BS – honesty is key

4. I’m a stickler with time and appreciate people that arrive on time

5. I love to laugh! And appreciate good mom jokes 🙂

6. Would choose white chocolate over any other candy – is chocolate considered candy?!

7. I love a good sale!

8. My favorite color is money green … just kidding no I’m not just green!

9. Obsessed with Disney movies and can watch them on repeat without a problem … did I mention I have little ones 🙂

10. I DO NOT, I mean DO NOT like scary movies such as the Shining or movies with underwater scenes such as Jaws. I love a good funny movie such as The Hangover

Questions and My Answers 

1. Why did you start writing your blog? After going back and forth for a few years out of fear of the unknown but passionate about my own journey with Chiari 1 Malformation + Syringomyelia, I finally did it! I want to raise awareness on Chiari and only hope to connect with others living with the same illness.  

2. Do you believe in God? Yes – He’s the reason I’m here today! Yes I am weak, I have my moments where I doubt His presence in my life because of what I live with, however as today’s gospel from Matthew 28:16-20 said, ‘I am with you always, to the very end of age.’ No, I didn’t know that by heart, I had to go back and get that for you!  🙂   I underwent very risky and life changing surgeries that could have put me six feet under. I am positive I am here for a reason(s), why, I can’t quite put my finger on that but I can only hope to be humble enough to understand why one day. 

3. What’s your favorite cuisine? Thai

4. Sunrise or Sunset? Sunset 

5. Which was the happiest moment in your life? I’ll choose moments – my little one’s births. No book, no movie, not listening to others experiences, absolutely nothing can prepare you for the birth of your child. I’ve had them via cesarean  and that first cry, that first meeting between baby and mother is breath taking. I have no words and can only pray you experience it for yourself. 

6. Define yourself in one word. Dreamer 

7. What’s your favorite book? The one book that I can remember that had me wanting to read it again, is The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. I read it when I was young and I was immediately drawn to it. 

8. What’s your favorite quote? ‘You’ve got to put your past behind you’ – Timon, The Lion King. So simple, yet it’s better said than done. If achieved though, I believe it can really be the only freeing thing you can do for yourself. 

9. If you are given 10000000 cash what would you do? Cash, wow, not even a check?! Nice! Ha! OK, I’d buy that purse I’ve been eyeing, travel and eat yummy food

10. What’s the thing that you hate the most? People that complain! And whine!

11. What’s the best quality that you see in your best friend? Please don’t feel bad or sorry or anything remotely close to that, but I do not have a ‘best friend.’ Maybe I used to, say in high school, not sure. But I believe people come and go from your life for many different reasons, so to give someone a title like ‘best friend,’ personally is setting too high of expectations on one being and ultimately resulting in me being disappointed. However, a quality(s) I best admire in friends are honesty, faithful/trusting and dependability.  

Questions 

 1. Why did you start writing your blog?

2. Do you believe in God?

3. What’s your favorite cusine?

4. Sunrise or Sunset?

5. Which was the happiest moment in your life?

6. Define yourself in one word.

7. What’s your favorite book?

8. What’s your favorite quote?

9. If you are given 10000000 cash what would you do?

10. What’s the thing that you hate the most?

11. What’s the best quality that you see in your best friend?

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My Nominees 

1. Magic In The Everyday

2.Simply Chronically Ill

3. My Li’l Place

Nominees, I appreciate your love for writing and continue to admire it in every one of your posts. Enjoy!

A-

Hard Mom Days: A Kindhearted Woman Gains Respect

Hard Mom Days: A Kindhearted Woman Gains Respect

The topic of motherhood can be a bit of a free for all – some think that either you’re doing too little or not enough and their need to give unsolicited advice to tell you what you should be doing with your children. This is why, I always choose to hold opinions of others to myself. As I myself run on survival mode.

So, I’ll begin by telling you how exhausted I am, how physically draining I feel, how sleepy I feel – that sleep that has you not being able to choose whether to eat or sleep and you choose to sleep, how hungry I feel to have maybe 5 minutes to myself! Not to go out, but rather have 5 minutes without the door to my bedroom or bathroom – because you know you can’t lock the door there, continuously opening with little voices asking where my ‘X’ toy is, where my ‘X’ shoe is, where my green ‘X’ shirt is and the list goes on! Yes I am grateful for the little ones, yes I feel overwhelmingly blessed to have them, yes I know they’re growing up, yes they will grow and leave my home. Yes, yes, yes! But give me a minute to let this out! Give me a moment without judgment! It’s OK as a mom to say, I need a break – and not only on Mother’s Day, a breather, a shower, a time to do my hair, a time to eat without sharing – is that being selfish? And a time for rest!

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What a week it’s been!! I have a house full of sick kids – and I won’t remind you how many there are, because the school going children tend to bring home all the germs they can gather and then spread them to the little ones. You know, that snowball effect?! And the only not-so sick child I had, today woke up throwing up. Welcome to motherhood! The land of the unknown, where anything can happen and where all things change at any given moment. Also, where your title as mom can quickly shift from mom to nurse to lullaby singer to clean up crew person of projectile things that come out of little ones mouth to sleep rocker of sick children, just name a few. And then just like that, it’s 4 am. I am so thankful that on most days, I can gather enough strength and not take out my chronic physical pain onto the children. We mothers can do that so quickly – especially when we are exhausted and running on no sleep. If I feel overwhelmed with the children, I give myself a time out. I take this time – be it 5 minutes or 2, to practice my breathing, gather and center myself. Because as mother’s we choose which road to take with each particular child of ours. The impatient child – that can test our own patience, the not-so still child, the loud child to the one that never seems to stop the crying.

‘A kindhearted woman gains respect’ from Proverbs 11:16 is such an encouraging scripture, it serves as a reminder how yelling and anything other than showing respect to the little ones is not a solution to solving a chaotic situation. Because when I’m tired, when I haven’t had the time to eat and had very little sleep, I can get mean, fast. The voice gets higher and I get snappy. So, this is a beautiful reminder to be kind and from my kindness the children will respond kindly in return. It’s so refreshing to know that in any ‘hard’ mom day, through your actions as a mom, you will gain your children’s respect.

‘As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you.’ – Isaiah 66:13 I often think that I am giving my all, to my children to my home to my spouse and at times ask, what about me, where do I stand, who comforts me?! Because as a mother, I comfort my little ones, at homework time – encouraging them, when they fall – healing them, when they can’t sleep – comforting them and when they feel scared – loving them. I say them because it makes me feel less of a priority and feel myself being pushed more and more to the far back of the line. However, this verse reminds me that I am a priority, that I am loved and that I am comforted by the most faithful of them all. With this He reminds me that as I comfort my child, He also comforts me – and you.

Hope you’ve had a wonderful Sunday.

A-

To the Stay At Home Mom, Find Your Passion

To the Stay At Home Mom, Find Your Passion

A few days ago, I  started thinking about other stay-at-home moms such as myself and the internal battles we all fight each day. So, I wanted to let you know my side of it all. As a stay-at-home mom I would have to admit sometimes staying home is not enough to make me feel fulfilled. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love staying home and caring for my little ones. Whether you have just begun having kids or have a large family like mine, the reality is that motherhood is challenging. Parenthood, I’d say is the toughest job, but also the most rewarding – there is nothing in the world like it. So, if you’ve had a good cry in your bathroom or in your bedroom at the end of a tough day, I’m here to tell you, it’s OK! We’ve all been there mom! This full-time, no vacations, no sick days, no days off title can quickly get you feeling blue and anxious. We all have our ups and downs. As difficult as a mother’s job is, let alone a stay-at-home mom or a mom working from home, we all have the same struggles. How to balance it all? How to stay sane? How to keep it all together while remembering yourself? And at the end of the day comes the internal struggle, did I do a good enough job with the kids today, did I get enough work done today?

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As someone whom once upon a time worked in the corporate world in the Downtown Miami area, since leaving have felt the need of doing something for me – for myself. Yes, I’m a mom, but first and foremost I am a woman, that once had interests and hobbies. Whether you loved sewing, painting, writing, exercising, they were your hobbies to do. These thoughts come from a woman whom has somehow lost herself in her role as a mom and wife. Hence this blog I began a short time ago. While I’m still feeling like a little fish in a big pond with this, I couldn’t be more excited about this new endeavor. I wasn’t sure what I was getting myself into with blogging, I just knew I wanted to write. I will tell you this, there’s a lot more work that goes into this than you may think. The behind the scenes is nothing short of a pretty mess. I have 6 littles, so most of my writing is done after bath time or bedtime. Just picture little feet running around, yelling behind you as you try to gather your thoughts! Difficult but possible – definitely possible!

Don’t get frightened, join the hustle that is working from home because your kids are still your number one priority. So, if you are trying to make it happen with a baby on your hip or trying to build an empire during your kids nap time, I’m with you, I get it! But, keep doing it, do what you need to do to get things DONE, to make things HAPPEN, get that phone call in the bathroom or closet, because lets be honest – it’s the only place we can talk with ZERO interruptions or when you’re praying to baby Jesus the U.P.S man doesn’t knock while you’re in the middle of something important. Not to mention trying to let everyone know that working from home is real WORK – maybe harder and no, you’re not flexible and no it’s not easy, not to mention trying to squeeze in some work while the kids are at home on Spring break, JESUS, yes, I know, I can relate.

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Nonetheless, find your passion mom, find what sparks joy in your heart, your interest, just find it! It’ll be hard work, not to mention you’ll be sleep deprived for a little while, but it’ll be worth it! You’ll find yourself again after having babies and it will get you so excited about life again. And know, hard work doesn’t go unnoticed, it’s not in vain. I would consider myself artistic and since creating this outlet, it has allowed me to express myself through writing – and as my psychologist put it so well, writing is free therapy! She and I are so amazed of how I’ve decided to go down this path – shocked is more like it, knowing how reserved and private I am when it comes to my life. However, this outlet has also allowed me to not only speak about my condition – which by the way 1 in 1,000 people have it! Insert shocked emoji here. But also spread awareness and allow myself to feel free to be honest and raw. I am so grateful to have finally taken the plunge on this after being on the fence for so many years. Yes, years! It’s slowly given me an opportunity to find myself again and go after dreams I thought weren’t possible. I’ve connected with companies I thought would never notice lil’ ole’ me and I have started to put my passion for art and design to use by creating merchandise. I’m working on getting Chiari Awareness and motherhood merchandise out there. I’m excited to share it all with you soon!

Finally, know it’s not cliché, you can really achieve anything you want, the only one holding you back, is you.

To every mom, the stay-at-home, the working stay-at-home, don’t give up – as the saying goes, “the days are long but the years are short,” know our little ones won’t be little for long. So, don’t be afraid to put yourself first every now and then – because when mom is happy, babies are happy.

Happy day friends.

-Ana

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Photo: Sebastien Gabriel