Reblog Wednesday: I Asked God: A Facebook Post From A Friend — Something to Stu Over

This post for ‘Reblog Wednesday’ couldn’t have come at a better time. The thoughts of wanting to feel better physically are reoccurring thoughts, coming in too often throughout my day. And the fact that I can’t change my circumstance or diagnosis is evident in this post and is the perfect reminder of things I conveniently choose to forget. This ‘Reblog Wednesday’ is from a blogger I hold dear and near to my heart, Stuarthis honesty, love for Christ and life, is what I appreciate from reading his work. I couldn’t appreciate him more than I already do.

This post unraveled the truths of my reality. I can either learn to accept my reality or continue to live in the falsehood of reminiscing of what my life once was – life without the prescription medication and physical pain. It’s up to me. If I can only touch ground, ‘come back to Earth,’ as they say, and stop living in the clouds, I’d be able to open my eyes to see my life as it is. And perhaps only then will my sense of purpose fuel my desire to live a more happy and fulfilled life.

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The conversation with God in the post reminded me of my own conversations with God.

I  want to tell God what to fix in my life …

my diagnosis – fix it, reverse it,

my physical pain – take it away,

my old, ‘normal self’ – bring her back,

my finances – increase it,

my brain / head – make it stop spinning,

my son’s autism diagnosis – make it better,

my happiness – give me more of it.

And all the while, I’ve been praying for what I cannot change. He’s saying surrender, trust me, leave it to me as I do all things for a reason – beyond your humble comprehension. The reasons for it, all will be revealed in due time – patience. And love, love is what I need, it’s what I should be praying more for, so that I may accept my diagnosis with love, accept things that I will not be able to change.

The trials and tribulations are only there to get me away from worldly things and closer to Him.

Have a blessed day.

A-

I asked God to take away my habit. God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. God said, No.. His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary. I asked God to grant me patience. God […]

via I Asked God: A Facebook Post From A Friend — Something to Stu Over

Have you seen my latest YouTube nail tutorial?!

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Sunshine Blogger Award

Sunshine Blogger Award

This has been insane! It’s been pouring awards around my neck of the woods and I’m deeply humbled :: insert happy face here :: Wendi over at Simply Chronically Ill has the best timing! I’ve had a challenging day, between going to the hospital for biopsy of my thyroid and leaving my kids behind telling them mommy is OK, I’ll be right back. There’s nothing like coming home and knowing that Wendi has nominated my blog for the Sunshine Blogger Award. You and your blog friend are amazing and I thank you for thinking of me! If you haven’t been to Wendi’s  blog you must!

HERE’S HOW IT WORKS…

The Rules:

1.) Thank the blogger(s) who nominated you and link back to their blog

2.) Answer the 11 questions the blogger asked you

3.) Nominate 11 new blogs to receive this award, and write them 11 new questions

4.) List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo in your post and/or on your blog.

Questions For Me:

1. What is your favorite thing about blogging awards?

To know that a fellow blogger has thought of me enough to consider and nominating me for an award that would have otherwise been given to someone else. The feeling is incredible!

2.  If you were a sports car which one would you want to be and why?

I have no idea about sports cars however, growing up with an older brother, he loved to watch two things, soccer games and NASCAR – we were huge fans of Dale Earnhardt and Jeff Gordon. That’s as close to a sports car as I’ll get.

3.  If you could only eat one color of food for a week, what color would it be?

Green, I love vegetables and a good salad, the one with the croutons, cheese, bacon and all that good stuff!

4. What is your favorite movie line and why?

It would have to be from ‘Jerry Maguire’ when Jerry says, ‘Hello. I’m looking for my wife. Alright. If this is where is has to happen, then this is where it has to happen. I’m not letting you get rid of me. How about that?’ and then Dorothy replies, ‘Shut up. Just shut up. You had me at hello.’ I mean HELLO ?! Can it get anymore cheesy and romantic and sad and adorable?! I love it!

5.  If you had to leave your house and take only 10 things with you (excluding all living beings) what would they be?

Excluding the 7 other obvious living beings of mine, OK. I’d say, my journal, my phone, my computer, my bible (because I don’t know where we’d be going and I just may need to do some heavy praying), money (because, you know, we’ll get hungry), food (just in case there isn’t any food to buy – I’m prepared!), my washer and dryer, car and ALL birth certificates just in case someone doubts all these kids are actually mine! Because, yes, it happens to me. all. the. time!

6. Describe yourself in two words.

1) Sick – always! ugh, I have Chiari + Syringomyelia and it comes with a lot of chronic pain and 2) listener – great listener

7. What is one sporting activity that you enjoy watching?

Gymnastics, these girls are so talented, it’s amazing – they’re amazing!

8. If you could give one piece of advice for all the world to hear what would it be?

To have more compassion for others, not to be so dismissive of others feelings, to be a little nicer. Be nice, say hello, you never know what others are going through.

“Be an encourager, the world has enough critics already”

9. What is your favorite encouraging quote?

There are a few but some are, “Train yourself to find the blessing in everything,” “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds. – James 1:2

“The pain that you’ve been feeling, can’t compare to the joy that’s coming” – Romans 8:18

10. If you had to learn a made up language, which one would you choose and why?

I think I would always want to be fully understood – I wouldn’t make anything up from anything that’d prevent us from getting there.

11. If you were to learn to play an instrument which one would you choose?

I would learn to play the piano. I grew up listening to classical music – growing up my mother always put Ludwig Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, Mozart, Johann Bach and I was also fortunate enough to work at a law firm that often gave me tickets to the ballet for free. Thanks to mami for introducing to classical music.

Questions For My Nominees (thank you Wendi I’ll be borrowing these):

  1.  What is your favorite thing about blogging awards?
  2.   If you were a sports car which one would you want to be and why?
  3.   If you could only eat one color of food for a week, what color would it be?
  4.   What is your favorite movie line and why?
  5.   If you had to leave your house and take only 10 things with you (excluding all living beings) what would they be?
  6.   Describe yourself in two words.
  7.   What is one sporting activity that you enjoy watching?
  8.   If you could give one piece of advice for all the world to hear what would it be?
  9.   What is your favorite encouraging quote?
  10.   If you had to learn a made up language, which one would you choose and why?
  11.   If you were to learn to play an instrument which one would you choose?

My Nominees:

Smiling Through The Pain

Magic In The Everyday

Invisibly Me

A Voice From Iran

To my nominees, please know that I enjoy your blog and think you are amazing! I hope to read your answers soon! Enjoy 😊

A-

Mystery Blogger Award – 2

Mystery Blogger Award

I want to thank my fellow Chiarian blogger over at Simply Chronically Ill for this amazing nomination! There is nothing like getting recognized by fellow bloggers and this amazing soul is phenomenal and her blog is filled with amazing content, her poetry is both thought provoking and intriguing. She also gives tips on how to save and links to great deals! What’s better than saving?! Thank you again and if you haven’t gone to her blog, pay her a visit! I appreciate how these awards allow you to get to know me, they’re fantastic!

Here are my questions for my nominees:

1. If you could cure one disease, what would it be and why?

This here, this here, is a great one! I would find a cure for Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia – that’s two not one, it’s OK! This thing is both painful and exhausting – find a cure already! I have six babies, SIX, find it now! 😉

2. If you could speak any other language what would it be and why?

Let’s see, my little ones and I speak both English and Spanish and at times I feel it just isn’t enough, so we should definitely try a third! I would speak – and I must thank Google for this, the South Korean dialect of Hanguk. I have Korean descent and would love to dive into something from the culture.

3. If you could do your life over, what is one thing you would change?

Oh wow, this is a bit deep! Although there are times – many, many, many times, where I think my life made a wide turn – or wrong turn, into what I thought wasn’t in my ‘plans’ I am a firm believer of how things change, people change and my life changed for a reason. I have chronic pain and an illness that in 2018 – today, has no cure, and although at times it may seem unfair, unbearable or frustrating, there is nothing God would allow in my life that I wouldn’t be strong enough to bear. 🙏🏽

4. What is one word you wished you heard more often?

Hello. Can we get a simple ‘hello?!’ How hard is that?! It’s often forgotten and dismissed as something that’s not important. I think a simple hello has the power to change someones day, to brighten someones day, to transform an inner most feeling someone may be having on that particular day. Maybe you’ve gone somewhere, entered a room or simply thought of someone but didn’t have the thought or courage of following through – because your excuse is always not having the time, say hello, send a hello to someone, to a friend, to a family member, hell to your spouse that woke up before you saw him/her leave the house! Send them a message and say, hello! So simple, yet so thoughtful and TRUST they’ll appreciate it! Amazing.

My nominees are:

My Li’l Place

Searching For My Inner Zen

Magic In The Everyday

Dorky Mom Doodles

The Godly Chic Diaries

Pink Herald

Mrs. Mother Dirt

Ramblings Of A Wonky Girl

Thank you and you’re welcome, to my nominees for participating. You and your blog are fantastic and deserving of this award – I can’t wait to read your answers!

Here are my questions for my nominees: 

1. If you could cure one disease, what would it be and why?

2. If you could speak any other language what would it be and why?

3. If you could do your life over, what is the one thing you would change?

4. What is one word you wished you heard more often and why?

Thank you Simply Chronically Ill for these questions, they’re great!

A-

Food For Thought: Calm a fearful heart

Food For Thought: Calm a fearful heart

‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.’Philippians 4:6

‘Be still, and know that I am God.’Psalm 46:10

As a mother, I often feel rushed, as if I don’t have time, time to gather my thoughts, time for myself, time to be still or time to take a deep breathe. It’s the endless things to do, the never ending things to clean, to sort, to fold, etc. The stress then triggers anxiety and it all feels as if I can’t breathe and time continues to move forward.

Aside from my Chiari + Syringomyelia I also have Hypothyroidism. I’ve been taking medication for the Hypothyroidism for a number of years, maybe 10 plus years. However, for the past couple of years it’s become an area of concern – this year having the symptoms worsening. I had decided to tackle my Syringomyelia first before taking on another health challenge – one thing at a time.

I’ve been a ‘responsible’ adult and made my list of things that need to be done to get to the ‘bottom’ of all this. I’ve seen a second opinion with a well known Endocrinologist – check, had my blood tested for him – check, had an ultrasound of my throat – check and finally Wednesday, saw the throat specialist or ENT, also known as the Otolaryngologist – check. As you know with the mountain of paper work that needs to get filled out when it’s the first visit, I listed my medications, surgeries, symptoms, etc. There he noticed one of my symptoms was vertigo and recommend I see a colleague of his to check my ears – sometimes an unknown issue with the ears can cause vertigo and imbalance. I’ve had my ears check before and nothing was found, but I’ll get them checked again – it doesn’t hurt to get a second opinion.

So, the outcome of my visit today with the ENT, I need to get a CT Scan done of my throat because lo and behold, a CT Scan gives better results than an ultrasound! After that, a biopsy, my ultrasound shows thyroid nodules that need to get tested, more than anything he wants to confirm it’s not cancerous either. And then from there he’ll determine and we’ll collectively decide if surgery is an option and or necessary.

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Yet, with all of this my heart is still, calm and at peace. May I be numb to surgeries, numb to never ending health issues that arise, so used to taking medication that have been tested to help me feel any sense of ‘normalcy’? Or am I just naive? I’m not sure, maybe it’s a mix of it all.

I do however know that there’s someone ahead of it all, someone who helps me not fear, not worry so much, not feel useless or hopeless, someone who gives me hope and is the one to calm my heart and is my rock as I sit in the doctors office as he reads me the results. He calms my anxiety and helps me stand to face yet another health concern and potential surgery. It is He who gets me through it all, and it is He who doesn’t leave my side.

Today I think of all those whom received unpleasant news yesterday or today, either it’s yourself or someone close to you, I think of you. Please know, you’re not alone, do not fear and know that there is hope during this time.

He is with you helping you be still. And it is He who reminds you that He is God.

Blessing to all.

A-

Photo: Luke Palmer

The Liebster Award

I can not be anymore excited about this … I was nominated for the Liebster Award by the amazing writer/blogger over at Reveuse!!!! Mahee please know I can not thank you enough for thinking about this little blog that could. I’m both humbled and thankful for this nomination. Your writing is both lovely as it is uplifting and I hope that you continue to inspire others the way you inspire me.

Liebster Award Image

About the Award

The Liebster is an award given to new and upcoming blogs, as nominated by fellow bloggers, in order to give exposure and foster a community of recognition and appreciation. The award was first implemented in 2011, and has been in place each year since.

The official rules for 2018 are as follows, and can be found in entirety on the blog The Global Aussie, at https://theglobalaussie.com/liebster-award-2018/

Rules — Overviews

⇒ Link to official rules blog post in your Liebster Award blog post
⇒ Answer the questions given to you (11)
⇒ Create more questions for your nominees to answer (11)
⇒ Comment on the official rules blog post with a link DIRECTLY to your Liebster Award nomination post.
⇒ Entries start 1st of Jan 2018 and ends on the 25th Dec 2018. The winner will be picked on the 31st of December.

Rules 

• Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.

• Answer the questions you were asked.

• Share 10 random facts about yourself.

• Nominate at least 3 blogs for the award.

• Ask your nominees 10 questions and inform them of the nomination.


Facts About Me

1. I love to bake – anything from birthday cakes to cupcakes to brownies to chocolate chip / sugar cookies to flan and I also love to try new recipes – however, I will not eat my own baking creations

2. I need like to be in control 

3. I’m impatient with people that talk in circles ultimately wanting to feed me BS – honesty is key

4. I’m a stickler with time and appreciate people that arrive on time

5. I love to laugh! And appreciate good mom jokes 🙂

6. Would choose white chocolate over any other candy – is chocolate considered candy?!

7. I love a good sale!

8. My favorite color is money green … just kidding no I’m not just green!

9. Obsessed with Disney movies and can watch them on repeat without a problem … did I mention I have little ones 🙂

10. I DO NOT, I mean DO NOT like scary movies such as the Shining or movies with underwater scenes such as Jaws. I love a good funny movie such as The Hangover

Questions and My Answers 

1. Why did you start writing your blog? After going back and forth for a few years out of fear of the unknown but passionate about my own journey with Chiari 1 Malformation + Syringomyelia, I finally did it! I want to raise awareness on Chiari and only hope to connect with others living with the same illness.  

2. Do you believe in God? Yes – He’s the reason I’m here today! Yes I am weak, I have my moments where I doubt His presence in my life because of what I live with, however as today’s gospel from Matthew 28:16-20 said, ‘I am with you always, to the very end of age.’ No, I didn’t know that by heart, I had to go back and get that for you!  🙂   I underwent very risky and life changing surgeries that could have put me six feet under. I am positive I am here for a reason(s), why, I can’t quite put my finger on that but I can only hope to be humble enough to understand why one day. 

3. What’s your favorite cuisine? Thai

4. Sunrise or Sunset? Sunset 

5. Which was the happiest moment in your life? I’ll choose moments – my little one’s births. No book, no movie, not listening to others experiences, absolutely nothing can prepare you for the birth of your child. I’ve had them via cesarean  and that first cry, that first meeting between baby and mother is breath taking. I have no words and can only pray you experience it for yourself. 

6. Define yourself in one word. Dreamer 

7. What’s your favorite book? The one book that I can remember that had me wanting to read it again, is The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. I read it when I was young and I was immediately drawn to it. 

8. What’s your favorite quote? ‘You’ve got to put your past behind you’ – Timon, The Lion King. So simple, yet it’s better said than done. If achieved though, I believe it can really be the only freeing thing you can do for yourself. 

9. If you are given 10000000 cash what would you do? Cash, wow, not even a check?! Nice! Ha! OK, I’d buy that purse I’ve been eyeing, travel and eat yummy food

10. What’s the thing that you hate the most? People that complain! And whine!

11. What’s the best quality that you see in your best friend? Please don’t feel bad or sorry or anything remotely close to that, but I do not have a ‘best friend.’ Maybe I used to, say in high school, not sure. But I believe people come and go from your life for many different reasons, so to give someone a title like ‘best friend,’ personally is setting too high of expectations on one being and ultimately resulting in me being disappointed. However, a quality(s) I best admire in friends are honesty, faithful/trusting and dependability.  

Questions 

 1. Why did you start writing your blog?

2. Do you believe in God?

3. What’s your favorite cusine?

4. Sunrise or Sunset?

5. Which was the happiest moment in your life?

6. Define yourself in one word.

7. What’s your favorite book?

8. What’s your favorite quote?

9. If you are given 10000000 cash what would you do?

10. What’s the thing that you hate the most?

11. What’s the best quality that you see in your best friend?

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My Nominees 

1. Magic In The Everyday

2.Simply Chronically Ill

3. My Li’l Place

Nominees, I appreciate your love for writing and continue to admire it in every one of your posts. Enjoy!

A-

Patience – ‘Three Days Three Quotes’ Nomination Day 3

The last day for ‘Three Days Three Quotes,’ thanks again to the wonderful blogger over at Reveuse.

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AND don’t forget to visit my nominees ….

To you three ladies, I’ve followed you three amazing women since day one of my blogging journey and have – and continue, to learn so much from you! I see your strength and vulnerability shine through in each one of your writings! Please know that you are loved, appreciated, that I admire you and continue to enjoy following your journeys!

HERE ARE THE RULES:

Thank the person who nominated you.

Post a quote for 3 days andexplain why it appeals to you.

Nominate bloggers each day!

MY THIRD QUOTE:

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet” Aristotle

I was so intrigued to find the proper definition for patience, that I Googled it. Patience is ‘the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.’

If you’ve followed my journey you know that I have chronic pain, not from time to time, not every other day, but daily. D-a-i-l-y. I like to say, I don’t have ‘good’ days,’ I have bad days and I have even worse days. And I’ll be transparent and allow my feelings to be shown through your screen. It’s my reality, anyone living with a chronic illness knows that we have to practice patience every single day. And I’m not talking about having patience for your spouse, children, co-workers, family, etc. no! You see, we have to be patient with ourselves, be loving to myself, my body and mind, not to get upset or angry as that can trigger other symptoms like the infamous frustration, that can ultimately make things much worse.

I am my worst enemy. I beat myself up for not being a ‘normal’ woman – because who wakes up daily with pain?! I beat myself up for not being able to stand for long periods of time – because my legs get so weak I’m a risk of falling. I beat myself up for allowing the everyday things ‘bother’ me – you see I am sensitive to noise, light, you know the sun is the worst for me, yes, how do shut off the world in order for me to feel ‘good.’ I beat myself up for not being able to meet others expectations – they’re just too high for me to meet. I beat myself up for not being able to get in the car for long periods of time – you see with Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia I get nauseated in the car when riding for too long and require I keep medication on hand and bags in the car in case the need arises to regurgitate, Disney trips are as daunting as they are lovely for the children. I beat myself up for having anxiety – you see I can’t have last minute invites, last minute guests in my home, etc. my anxiety will go through the roof, I can’t do things on a ‘whim,’ I can’t do things like the ‘average’ woman can, like go to the grocery store without feeling pain run through my body, I can’t get last minute notices from my children’s teachers for a school event, my agoraphobia will prevent me from being present.

I need to have patience with myself, patience to love myself as I am and not want to change a thing about me, pain and all. I remind myself that I am me and there’s no one quite like me. I am beautifully made by the most high that has made me in His image. I am here to live with Chiari for reasons I am too stubborn to understand. I am doing the best that I can and I am as best of a mother as I can be. As this wonderful quote says, ‘patience is bitter, but it’s fruit is sweet.’ Yes! It’s so bitter, it’s harsh, it’s a pill too hard to swallow at times, it’s a tough reality too many times hard to accept, to face, to know! To know it’s there staring back at me …

Yet, yet! It’s fruit, it’s a message, it’s an everyday motivation to keep going, to keep walking, to stand on my weakest days, this makes patience so sweet! It’s as sweet as they come, to be taught to have patience from such a horrible illness is the sweet reminder of the strength that lies within me.

NOMINATIONS:

1. Magic In The Everyday

2. Simply Chronically Ill

3. Discovering Your Happiness

If you’ve missed any of the other two days of the quote challenge, you can read Appreciate Life Day 1 and Forgiveness + Hope Day 2.

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Hope you all enjoy doing this unique challenge and I look forward to reading the quotes you’ve chosen!

A-

Forgiveness + Hope – ‘Three Days Three Quotes’ Nomination Day 2

In continuation with the ‘Three Days Three Quotes’ I will not do ‘Nail File Fridays.’ I was nominated by the wonderful blogger over at Reveuse.

AND don’t forget to visit my nominees! They are such amazing women. I absolutely love following their blogs, they’re so interesting and inspirational!

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HERE ARE THE RULES:

Thank the person who nominated you.

Post a quote for 3 days and explain why it appeals to you.

Nominate bloggers each day!

MY SECOND QUOTE:

“Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different” Oprah Winfrey

I have kept this quote so dear and near to my heart – I mean how can I not?! I grew up in a single-parent home, my mother raising three kids on her own, working two to three jobs at a time, trying to make ends meet. I was the youngest of three. I was about 5 years old when I quickly realized I hated did not like the weekends with my father. I also disliked anything related to Father’s Day because at school I would be obligated to participate in making Father’s Day cards and such things. It wasn’t for any particular reason other than this meant being away from my mother – they were divorced for about 11 years, reconciled and have now been married for about 15 years. All thanks to Him. So, this quote among other things have helped me see that my father was not one, in any way a monster two, a cruel man or three, the enemy – he made mistakes because of the weakness that lies in man. We have recovered our father-daughter relationship that was once non-existent and have healed what was once broken.

Also, my Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia Diagnosis – it’s incredibly exhausting just thinking about it! I have begun therapy which has been a great source in my journey to healing. I go back and forth thinking of the what-if’s, what if I was born different and not with Chiari – there is no such thing as having been born ‘normal,’ what if I hadn’t gotten married and maybe this wouldn’t have happened – Chiari was inevitable because I was born with it, what if I was stronger – I am as strong as I need to be, what if I could be like these other school moms without a care in the world and living pain free – looks are deceiving and I may have physical chronic pain however these other school moms I so ‘admire’ are battling other life pains.

This quote reminds me that giving up the hope that Chiari if not present in my life today things could have been different, is a lie! I am not Chiari rather I am living with Chiari. It’s given me the strength I never knew I had and that is worth not hoping my life could have been any different than what it is today.

NOMINATIONS:

1. Four Jordans

2.

3. A Disney World Adventurer

NORDSTROM Half-Yearly Sale! SAVE up to 40% on selected styles now through June 3.

Hope you all enjoy doing this unique challenge and I look forward to reading the quotes you’ve chosen!

A-