‘I Look To You’

This morning while trying to get somethings done for my social media accounts, I decided to put on some background music. And I decided on this song, ‘I look to you,’ by the late Whitney Houston. I don’t normally work while listening to music, it’s really distracting and I get nothing done. My work area needs to be quiet and in order. But the calling was there, for me to go back to this song, and it lifted me.

I’ve been connecting with others with Chiari and although I’m grateful, it also tends to try to pull me down. On one hand I’m happy there others experiencing what I’m going through, but on the other, it’s incredibly sad to know there are others trying to get through their day with chronic pain.

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I get asked a few questions when someone realizes my diagnosis, and one that always sticks out is, ‘how do you do it?’ I understand because it’s almost dumbfounding to see this mother of six living with chronic pain. And there is no one answer, there is no perfect answer, actually there is no answer other than Him. He gets me out of bed when my body isn’t able to, He reminds me I am loved when I feel I’m a failure, He helps me take the steps when I’m in too much pain to walk, He holds my head when I feel it’s going to explode in pain, He helps me care for my children when I feel too ill, He reminds me to take my medication because He knows how much I dislike them, it’s Him, that’s how I do it – daily.

If you’ve never heard this song – or haven’t heard it in a while, I invite you to listen. It’s an amazing song, full of hope, because what you’re going through today you will get through by looking up to Him.

My favorite verse in the song, ‘After all my strength is gone, In you I can be strong.’ 

I Look to You
As I lay me down
Heaven hear me now
I’m lost without a cause
After giving it my all
Winter storms have come
And darkened my sun
After all that I’ve been through
Who on earth can I turn to
I look to you
I look to you
After all my strength is gone
In you I can be strong
I look to you
I look to you
Yeah
And when melodies are gone
In you I hear a song
I look to you
After losing my breath
There’s no more fighting left
Sinking to rise no more
Searching for that open door
And every road that I’ve taken
Led to my regret
And I don’t know if I’m gonna make it
Nothing to do but lift my head
I look to you
I look to you
Yeah
And when all my strength is gone
In you I can be strong
I look to you
I look to you
Oh yeah
And when melodies are gone
In you

A-

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Reblog Wednesday: A Six-Word Story — HappymessHappiness

There have been times when I’ve felt unworthy, unworthy of love – of being loved, unworthy of blessings, of happiness, simply unworthy. And then things happen, time passes and I realize that I too deserve happiness, I too deserve blessings on blessings. I remember that there is no perfect being walking on this earth and that I try. I try my best as a mother, wife, sister and daughter, and that I strive. I strive to be better and do better than I did yesterday. As this lovely post by Happymess Happiness so perfectly in just but a few words put it – ‘Even broken things can be loved.’ Indeed.

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So, if you feel defeated, lonely, unhappy, grieving, in pain – broken, just know that you too can be loved, broken and all.

A-

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Even broken things can be loved.

via A Six-Word Story — HappymessHappiness

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Reblog Wednesday: How to Set Boundaries with a Toxic Person — MakeItUltra™ Psychology

It’s rather a bit unsettling to think of the need to cut ties with someone. At times they’re friendships or even a family member. As I continue to grow, I’ve realized what I want, what I will accept and will not tolerate in friendships and overall relationships. I believe this to be an internal battle also because I was taught to love thy neighbor, to accept people as they are, and to love in the dimension of the cross. But what happens when others no longer serve a positive purpose in my life, when they no longer lift me, but rather break me. Please, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely believe we will have our moments with others when we will disagree, and we’ll forgive one another and move on. But what if this is recurring and happening constantly?! What if I consider myself a good friend and yet have come to realize a friendship in my life isn’t reciprocating the same level of love and respect for our friendship. You know, that one sided friendship, do you cut ties, do you call it quits or do you continue to accept their behavior?!

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This week I bring you this wonderful post on the matter by the very talented Dr. Perry over at Make It Ultra. He lists a few suggestions he uses in his practice on how to create healthy boundaries with others. He first mentions to be honest with the other person about your feelings, not adding to the negativity and not fearing the loss of a relationship that just feeds you negativity. If you haven’t read the full post, please stop by his blog!

A-

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “People inspire you or they drain you. Pick them wisely.” ~Hans F. Hansen We all know at least one person who seems to walk around in a state of doom and gloom. They are in short supply of joy but have an overabundance of negativity. This individual may […]

via How to Set Boundaries with a Toxic Person — MakeItUltra™ Psychology

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Reblog Wednesday: I Asked God: A Facebook Post From A Friend — Something to Stu Over

This post for ‘Reblog Wednesday’ couldn’t have come at a better time. The thoughts of wanting to feel better physically are reoccurring thoughts, coming in too often throughout my day. And the fact that I can’t change my circumstance or diagnosis is evident in this post and is the perfect reminder of things I conveniently choose to forget. This ‘Reblog Wednesday’ is from a blogger I hold dear and near to my heart, Stuarthis honesty, love for Christ and life, is what I appreciate from reading his work. I couldn’t appreciate him more than I already do.

This post unraveled the truths of my reality. I can either learn to accept my reality or continue to live in the falsehood of reminiscing of what my life once was – life without the prescription medication and physical pain. It’s up to me. If I can only touch ground, ‘come back to Earth,’ as they say, and stop living in the clouds, I’d be able to open my eyes to see my life as it is. And perhaps only then will my sense of purpose fuel my desire to live a more happy and fulfilled life.

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The conversation with God in the post reminded me of my own conversations with God.

I  want to tell God what to fix in my life …

my diagnosis – fix it, reverse it,

my physical pain – take it away,

my old, ‘normal self’ – bring her back,

my finances – increase it,

my brain / head – make it stop spinning,

my son’s autism diagnosis – make it better,

my happiness – give me more of it.

And all the while, I’ve been praying for what I cannot change. He’s saying surrender, trust me, leave it to me as I do all things for a reason – beyond your humble comprehension. The reasons for it, all will be revealed in due time – patience. And love, love is what I need, it’s what I should be praying more for, so that I may accept my diagnosis with love, accept things that I will not be able to change.

The trials and tribulations are only there to get me away from worldly things and closer to Him.

Have a blessed day.

A-

I asked God to take away my habit. God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. God said, No.. His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary. I asked God to grant me patience. God […]

via I Asked God: A Facebook Post From A Friend — Something to Stu Over

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Are You a Good Friend to Yourself? — MakeItUltra™ Psychology

This post I share with you today comes from Dr. Perry and it speaks on how loving yourself serves as a platform, sets the tone, as to how your friends will value your friendship in their lives. As I continue to grow older, I contemplate many times on the importance of self love and friendships. I also have come to understand that some friendships are not meant to remain in your life forever. This has even more truth when you live with Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia, chronic pain is not for the faint of heart. And fortunately or not, you realize even more so when is the time to put an end on friendships that no longer serve well to your health and to your life in general. You know the friendships that bring on more stress than they do joy – those ‘friendships.’

I’ve realized that loving me, putting my feelings first, being compassionate for my own being, is far more important than any outside friendship. Because when you love yourself and know the value you bring as a friend when others don’t, I think that’s when it’s time to call it quits to a friendship that no longer brings positivity to your life and family. There will be a mourning period, but I simply wish them well and move on.

In this post here Dr. Perry, highlights the love and sympathy you should have for yourself, and asks, what kind of friend are you being to yourself? I think first and foremost be a friend to yourself to then know what to look for in friendships.

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “A friend is a gift you give yourself.” ~Robert Louis Stevenson What kind of friend are you? Are you attentive, kind and compassionate or, are you neglectful, uncaring and critical? Scrolling through quotes on the internet, I was reminded of the immense value we place on friendship. […]

via Are You a Good Friend to Yourself? — MakeItUltra™ Psychology

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Reblog Wednesday: Gratitude — Tales from the Mama Duck

So, this here doesn’t require too many words. It left me speechless when I first read it and it’s leaving me speechless now. It’s so incredibly true, a picture is indeed ‘worth a thousand words.’ The post I share with you today is by the incredible blogger over at Family 5 Power – go over to her site and continue to enjoy her other incredible content!

Thank you Mama Duck for another reminder of the true meaning of Christmas.

Ana-

“Let us thank God for his priceless gift!” 2 Corinthians 15:9 GNT

via Gratitude — Tales from the Mama Duck

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Happy Meme Monday: My Non-Christmas List

There’s always something that happens in life that makes you reevaluate future decisions. This is what has happened to me for Christmas, like the meme I share with you today.

The importance of this day has made me realize that this time of year isn’t about presents and giving out really fancy gifts. It’s not about stressing on how much money is enough or isn’t. It’s about spending time with those you love and making the most out of such a joyous occasion. So, if you don’t get to purchase something in form of an object to someone, don’t stress and know Christmas is far greater than any object you can purchase at a store.

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Happy Monday!

A-

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