Chiari Sister, I See You

Chiari Sister, I See You

As a stay at home mom, I frequently think about other moms that are in my position. It’s no secret that the stay at home parent doesn’t get enough credit. The day to day seems lost in translation to many, except the one living it. And often we need the reassurance, because as mothers – humans, we want to be seen and loved.

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Whether you have Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia or any other illness that physically impairs you from feeling your best, know that you are doing your very best. I often compare myself to the wrong people, to those that don’t have physical pain and not needing to be medicated for pain relief.

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As for the stay at home parent living with chronic pain though, the day to day is different and is a tiny bit more challenging. And for me, the physical pain can cause me to have self-doubt, so today, to my chronic pain brothers and sisters, I want you to know, I hear you and see you.

I want to reassure you that you are enough.

Just in case you haven’t heard it today, you did good!

You did more cleaning than your body could handle. It’s OK, not to do more, your body will thank you later.

Yes, it’s OK, the rest can wait.

You folded the laundry that had been sitting in the basket for over a week – no judgment, you did it!

You cooked a meal with love, and that’s all your family could ask for.

You’re pushing through the pain with every step you take – you’re a warrior!

Don’t be hard on yourself, you’re 1 in 1,000 uniquely designed people and not everyone will understand – and that’s OK!

Push through, shower; push through, brush your hair; push through, push through, push through.

Take a break, a much needed break.

Know that your illness doesn’t define you – you are beautiful, believe it.

You are so loved, and you are just as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside.

You are not alone.

Chiari sister – I see you.

A-

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Reblog Wednesday: Lies I Tell Myself: IV — chiariconversations

This weeks ‘Reblog Wednesday’ has come at the perfect time, and it’s by none other than Michelle over at Chiari Conversations. She’s a fellow Chiarian and her vulnerability and honesty is like breathing fresh air each time I read her posts. If you have neurological issues, or are a fellow Chiarian yourself, please follow her journey along!

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And I say it comes at the perfect time because I have not been quite myself, the body pains have increased, my left leg and foot have been getting increasingly numb and the vertigo, well, the vertigo is a pain in the rear end! I’m going on 6 years since my brain surgery for my Chiari Malformation and every day feels much like I’m going through a slow death – only I’m still here and my brain is being squished by the minute. The stabbing pain behind my neck doesn’t subside and what seems to be the never ending hospital / doctor visits can make me feel much like an elderly than a young mom.  As Michelle clearly states, a few years ago I really don’t know how I could have handled these constant headaches. It’s not your casual headache, ‘you missed a meal, you are a little stressed’ kind of head ache – no my dearest friend and reader, this is a, run and close the blinds, turn off the lights, turn off the volume to everything, including the neighbors barking dog and let’s hibernate for say, a few weeks – kind of headache! The one where you momentary just wish to be a vampire, because lets face it, I wish the world around me was pitch dark, complete darkness.

If you have Chiari Malformation or not, maybe you are dealing other health issues and can relate …

The feelings of wanting to feel like wanting to enjoy life / social gathering without having the next day or even weeks be filled with even more pain and misery. Yes!

The feeling of not wanting to be told ‘you’re strong’ but know that I’d rather lay in bed in a fetal position because I can’t take the pain. Yes! 

The wanting to go to the store and not have to worry about my left leg – body, being overstimulated and being at risk of falling in public. Yes! 

The wanting to go out to a public place, say, church, etc. and just setting it on mute because the chatter and noise level is too loud for my brain to handle. Yes!

The need to want to be ‘able’ and not ‘unable.’ Yes! 

The feeling of constantly needing help, because lets face it, I can’t do it all – literally. Yes!

The need to want to tell scream people to ‘get.to.the.point’ because conversations overstimulate my brain. Yes! 

The wanting to stop being told, ‘but you look good’ because I know that if I looked like how I felt, I’d scare even my own offspring. Yes! and Yes!

What are some of your new normal’s?

A-

It can be difficult to really KNOW whether the pain is normal or not when dealing with neurological issues. It doesn’t help that pain is personal even in the temporal sense. Five years ago, I WOULD NOT have been able to handle this level of constant headache. I would have thought I was dying. Today, […]

via Lies I Tell Myself: IV — chiariconversations

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The Liebster Award – 4

Thank you to my fellow blogger The Eclectic Contrarian. If you haven’t read his incredible poems or been to his blog for some lifting and motivational writing – pay him a visit! Thank you again for your support, I’m humbled.

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Here’s How It Works:

• Create a new blog post on your blog thanking the person that nominated you, link to their blog and put in a graphic of the award.

• Answer the questions that were provided, and then share some facts about yourself.

• Create a new set of your own questions for others to answer.

• Nominate 5-11 others and share your blog post with them so they can accept their awards

I’ve Been Asked The Following:

-Whats a topic you love and don’t love to write about?

Always appreciate humor. And honesty. Or should I say honesty in form of humor.

I began this blog with Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia in mind, however, I have my days when I just can’t get myself to speak on the subject. It just seems to drag me down at times, realty sometimes can get the best of me and I choose to not think on the matter.

-Who and what influences you to write?

Life itself, the brutal truths, the humor in life, my kids and what’s been on my mind at that particular time.

-What emotion gets your creative gears rolling?

Whichever emotion I am feeling at that moment is the best in getting me to write. Whether I’m feeling a bit low, happy or excited.

-Do you write from who you are? Or, who you wish you to be?

I like to go with who I am. I may not be everyone’s cup of ‘tea’ but being myself, authenticity is what will be the greatest in the long run. Those whom choose to stay, will and those who don’t, won’t. And that’s OK.

-Are you a city, country, foreign or even fantasy/sci-fi type of person?

Let’s go with foreign. I’m a little complex, but authentic.

Interesting Things About Me:

I’m a whopping 5′ feet tall!

I’m a righty and have two of my little girls that are lefty.

One of my favorite actresses is Julia Roberts and comedians Robin Williams†

I dislike talking on the phone – and texting

I will hold you to your word, which can be both a blessing and a curse.

I like to be punctual / on time to places. I believe firmly in respecting peoples time.

I think communication is key in any relationship, friendship or otherwise.

My family absolutely loves all things Disney World, including Walt Disney himself, his story, life, how it all began, etc.

Am very much looking forward to the movie ‘Toy Story 4’ being released later this year

As a stay at home mom, I like to work in an organized and clean house, otherwise it’s a no-go!

If I can learn how to do it, and do it myself, I will, for instance, painting walls, dying my own hair at home – been doing it for years, and just recently, cutting my boys hair at home because at $20 x3 boys = doing it myself! No offense to the professionals  🙂

I Nominate:

Simply Chronically Ill

Daily Grind Of A Stay At Home Mom

Bereaved Single Dad

Stubaby777

Gods Whispers Of Truth

My Questions To You Are:

• Do you feel your blog represents who you truly are?

• When in a rut, what motivates you to continue to write?

• Is there a topic that is off limits in your writing / blog?

• Was there any one person that motivated you in starting your blog?

Thank you to my nominees, I appreciate your time, so please take your time in responding.

Ana

January 2019 and 500 Plus Followers

I have been incredibly blessed this past year, not only in celebrating this blog which has led me to interact with some great people but for giving me another year for self growth. I let go of self doubt and the fear that had held me back from doing things that I wanted to do for so long. I took the leap of faith, found the time and begun what I did as a self care hobby now turned into my very own YouTube channel – yes, it’s very terrifying but exciting. I’ve also found a way to enjoy the design aspect of art and opened my online store with RedBubble. If there’s one thing I’ve learned as I get older, is that risks are worth taking when there’s passion behind it.

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Also, in celebration of my 500 followers, I want to thank you all, for giving me the encouragement to continue to speak on my condition and chronic pain – Chiari Malformation and Syringomyelia. And in continuing to honor that, I’ll share with you five things about me I have yet to share.

  1. My most favorite scent is lavender.
  2. Even though I live with chronic pain, I have a high tolerance for pain.
  3. I’ve had 10 surgeries.
  4. I am crafty, love all things DIY – so fun! And lastly ….
  5. My most favorite number is 5.

May you be blessed and have a heart filled with courage to accomplish things this new year and always.

A-

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Versatile Blogger Award

I’ve been nominated for this award by the ever so strong and wonderful James over at My Place 3187. This is my first ‘Versatile Blogger Award’ and am beyond excited, so thank you again James for thinking of me.

Versatile Blogger Award

Rules:

  1. Thank the blogger who Nominated you for this Award.
  2. Include a link to their blog.
  3. Select 15 Bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly.
  4. Nominate these 15 Bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award.
  5. Let each of your Nominees know that you have Nominated them on one of their blog posts.
  6. Finally, tell the blogger who nominated you 7 things about yourself.

Seven Things About Myself:

  1. This is a BIG one – ready?! My name is Ana not Chiari
  2. I don’t like chocolate – but do enjoy other desserts and treats
  3. I have six little’s – no twins, you read right, six (Enlgish), seis (Spanish), sei (Italian)
  4. I’m fluent in English and Español 
  5. I know my numbers in Italiano – only, I tried
  6. I was diagnosed in 2013 with Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia a congenital condition and brain disorder, I’ve had brain surgery for Chiari Malformation (decompression craniectomy) and in 2017 spinal canal surgery for Syringomyelia (laminectomy) – was placed a syrinx-shunt
  7. I have a YouTube Channel – simple and easy nail polish tutorials

Bonus: I enjoy all types of music – including country … my current replay / favorite Bebe Rexha feat. Florida Georgia Line ‘Meant To Be’ – so good!

My Nominees Are:

Bereaved Single Dad

All The Shoes I Wear

Cole Camp Fire Blog

Jason Frels

The Eclectic Contrarian

Something To Stu Over

Everyday Magic With Jubilee

Maggie Tiggles

Fight MS Daily

WCR 281

Simply Chronically Ill

Miraculous Smile

My Namaste 365 Online

A sweet thank you to all my nominees, I always enjoy your posts and look forward to reading ‘seven things’ about you all!

A-

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Reblog Wednesday: My story — God’s Whispers of Truth

In my short blogging journey I can say, that I’ve come across some great people here on WordPress – phenomenal! These individuals are going through their own struggles yet still find a way to find strength and continue to find the light through the chaos that life can sometimes be. This is where today’s share comes in, I want you to meet Vivian, a fellow blogger, a sweet mama of four, wife and warrior fighting TBI – traumatic brain injury. I share her story in hopes that it allows you to know that what you’re going through today, you will get through because of Him.

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

When I was diagnosed with Chiari , I can’t tell you I didn’t feel alone, I can’t tell you I didn’t feel scared and I can’t tell you I felt hopeless. But with time, things became clear and I became aware that through my diagnosis God has been helping me, helping me with patience and helping me accept myself, as I am – illness and all. He’s ahead of it all, ahead of any diagnosis and ahead of the plans He has for me.

A-

Welcome, my name is Vivian and I’m a TBI warrior, homeschooling mom of four and wife to a great and hard-working man. As a Christian walking through the valley of brain injury and recovery, I can not stress enough how much the power of God’s strength has held me up and given me courage and […]

via My story — God’s Whispers of Truth

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Thanksgiving Tag

I was tagged by My Namaste 365 Online with this ‘Thanksgiving Tag’ she created – congratulations again, and I’m so excited she did! It’s unbelievable to think Thanksgiving is around the corner, time does indeed go by faster as I age – or does it?! This is a beautiful season to see the beautiful blessing God has poured into my life, both big and small and with this tag I’ll write down things I am thankful for, enjoy!

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Rules:

1. List your thankful ABC.

2. Add one theme clip art to your post.

3. Tag 3 people who’d you hope would participate.

Thankful ABC:

A- Accepting things that are beyond my control

B- Beauty around me

C- Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia, they’ve taught me to be more patient and accepting of my diagnosis

D- Daily bread

E- Endless support

F- Family

G- God’s love

H- Husband

I- Ice Cream, Vanilla

J- Joy I get from my little ones

K- Kindness from WordPress community

L- Love from God

M- My little ones

N- New beginnings

O- Opportunities to take on new challenges (my blog and my YouTube channel)

P- Patience God has for me

Q- Quest to become a better version on me

R- Remembering to think of others before myself

S- Simple things in life, stopping to enjoy them more often

T- Thankful for my ‘small‘ family

U- Undoubtedly blessed

V- Value the people in my life

W- Wait on God, learn to be more patient with God’s plan

X- ‘X’ out the negativity and be more positive!

Y- ‘You’ matter, don’t forget that

Z- Zzzz’s (sleep) I get, whenever possible!

My Nominees:

The Eclectic Contrarian

Gods Whispers Of Truth

Miraculous Smile

Chiari Conversations

Bereaved Single Dad

All The Shoes I Wear

I nominate you because I admire you and your amazing blogs. I look forward to reading your ‘Thankful ABC‘ lists!

Ana